This Present Guilt

We all do it. We leave the house in the morning and head off to work. Whether work is at an office, or on your computer at a coffee shop or anywhere else. We sit down to start pouring into our work – BUT first, we think of what we left behind or dropped off at daycare. Our precious little babies. We mommas know, no matter what age, they are always our babies. We get all sentimental about them and thinking about what we are missing or about how much fun we’d be having back home snuggling, reading and playing with them. 

Guilt starts to set in as we sit there without them, and we wonder if we should pack up our stuff and head home to enjoy those blissful moments and see how the Lord will use us to change their little lives. This guilt leads to distracted work. 

And there is where Satan is. Using false guilt to diminish what God wants to do through us. We could spend all day thinking that we should be living in the utopian version of whatever it is we are missing out on. But think about reality here. Remember when you WERE with your kid/s and trying to get work done? You were just wishing for some peace and quiet to think and accomplish the tasks on your agenda. 

Let’s face it. The grass is always greener on the other side AND the guilt is always heavier on our side. Guilt over not being everywhere at once is not founded in reality, or in truth. 

Let’s work to not amplify those things we experience true guilt and issues we need to bring to the Lord with guilty feelings over made-up things. Let’s live in freedom the Cross provides us, so we can actually enjoy our kiddos we feel guilty for not enjoying more. 

A way to live this practically might look like this: finding one whole hour in the morning + again later in the day to dedicate wholly to your child/children. No phones, no tv, no work, NO distractions.  Ask them questions, play with them, read with them. Give them your all. Fill those little tanks. Then, when the dishes are calling your name from the sink, or dinner needs prepped, or any of the other million things we must get done on the daily, you can accomplish those tasks without feeling guilty about it. 

Mommas. I used to get frustrated by the repeated message of grace in church. I thought is meant a free pass to sin and that upset me. But that’s not real grace. Understanding grace (the real thing) enables us to live an obedient life. Grace does not replace obedience; it fuels our obedience. As we seek to be more fully present, we need to cling to grace rather than living in false guilt. 

Let’s not let our guilt about not being present with our kiddos become yet another distraction from being present with them. Let’s invite grace to propel us into obedience and into undistracted moments with our littles – without guilt hitching a ride. 

Today’s Prayer

Heavenly Father, I long to be present with my son, but in doing so, I carry a weight of guilt that you never asked me to carry. Show me how to walk in the freedom that you’ve already paid for me. Let your grace move me forward in obedience so I can enjoy present moments with my son without guilt riding along. In your mighty name I pray, Amen. 

One Reply to “This Present Guilt”

  1. Mom’s of all ages can carry guilt.
    Easy to look for the would have, should have, could have…and not accept GRACE to be in the moment.
    Very well written.

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